The Work of Byron Katie addressing Racism
Working with the thought, “White People are Scary.”
What I love about this video is the ease of standing in the truth and safety of this place(the fourth question and the turnarounds), looking back. Sometimes, for me, it is helpful and keeps me from feeling that incredibly powerful pull into the quicksand “black hole of my past” that sometimes happens when I am in the third question. Thank you Katie!
Make sure to visit The Work of Byron Katie for more information and resources!
ACCEPTING WHAT IS
One of the greatest paradoxes of human existence is understanding the process of change.
When something goes “wrong,” when a partner does something offensive or when we are not satisfied with some aspect of our lives, we will immediately feel an unpleasant emotion such as anger, resentment, fear, sadness, or disappointment. When we feel unpleasant feelings our first impulse is to rush in and try to “change” the situation. The basic belief that underscores the need to change, is” this should not be.” If something goes “wrong” we must “fix” it, if a partner does something offensive we must criticize him or her until he or she “changes their ways.” Anything to avoid the reality of our feelings. Eventually we come to the realization that “trying to change” the situation (or another) often leads to the opposite result—-no change at all.
When we turn our attention to our own feelings, we often take the same attitude. We try to “do” something about the way we feel. This “doing something” about our feelings often results in avoiding the emotions in any number of ways. We may try to “pretend”
not to feel the what we feel, we may “medicate” the feeling through “legal” or “illegal” drugs, we might drink over, gamble over it, sleep over it, or even act the feelings out. The more we try to “get rid” of what we feel, the more emotion seems to hang around. Again, no change at all.
What if, instead of “trying to change” the situation or our feelings we consider the possibility of acceptance? When we consider the possibility of accepting something, our first response is often, “Why would I want to accept this rotten feeling?” (or even accept
this rotten situation or horrible behavior of another). And so our first response might be to reject the notion of “acceptance.” But let’s look at what truly happens when we truly seek
to “accept” an unpleasant reality.
One evening an old Cherokee told his grandson
about a battle that goes on inside people. He said,
“My son, the battle is between two wolves inside us.
“One is Evil ==> It is anger, envy, jealousy, sorrow,
regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment,
inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego.
“The other is Good ==>It is joy, peace, love,
hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence,
empathy, generosity, truth, compassion and faith.”
The grandson thought about it for a minute and
then asked his grandfather: “Which wolf wins?”
The old Cherokee simply replied, “The one you feed.”